Tag Archives: Amazon River Boat

The Dollar Challenge: What will a buck get you in every Latin American country?

Bee Says: Before we went travelling, we got a few nice farewell gifts. For example, Nick’s dad gave us two identical emergency blankets, which luckily we could return to him unused at the end of our trip. Meg got me a nifty pink Leatherman and a super strength head torch. My favourite gift of all was from my good friend (and now member of Team Bridesmaid) Kerry. She works in a bureau de change, and knows ever-y-thing about currency and foreign moneys. She had the genius idea of presenting us with 15 dollar notes before we left; one for each country we would be visiting and she set us the great dollar challenge. We were to report back on what we felt was the best purchase we made for a dollar in each country. Not only was this just a really interesting project to keep us out of trouble, but it also really helps to highlight the strength of the dollar in different countries and the comparative wealth between them. So thank you Kerry for being such a smart cookie – check out her lovely Leeds foodie blog here, and we hope you (and everyone else) enjoy the results.

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1. VENEZUELA – GUARAPITA OVERLOAD

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Bee Says: Ah Venezuela, the first country we visited and which remains right in the top spots of our all-time favourite destinations. Whilst we were there, the exchange rate wobbled massively in our favour and meant it was the richest we were in any country. While the official rate was 10 bolivars to the pound, and 7 to the dollar, the black market had exploded and gave us rates of 50 bolivars to the pound and 35 to the dollar. To put this in context, a beloved bottle Polar beer cost around 30p! But our first winner for the great Dollar Challenge had to be our discovery of guarapita. Whilst flicking nervously through our South America on a Shoestring guide book on the flight to Caracas, my magpie eyes spotted a recommendation for a local Venezuelan cocktail; a combination of rum with passion fruit. On our last night in Puerto Colombia, we decided we had to go seek out this mysterious drink and see what all the fuss was about. I marched up to a van selling booze on the street and ordered two guarapitas (in my fumbling just-off-the-flight Spanish) and the guy behind the bar lifted out TWO huge litre bottles of orange stuff. Realising my mistake I quickly explained I only wanted two CUPS of guarapita. This was still misunderstood as I was passed a litre bottle with two empty plastic beakers! I was about to explain further, when the chap told me the price and the litre bottle cost… yup! About 75cents.

As you can see from the very legitimate old Russian Vodka bottle it came in, guarapita is brewed in someone’s back garden and certainly tasted as you’d expect. Heavy on the rum, less so on the fruit. We sat on a low wall next to the harbour, watching the sunset and the birds swoop and the locals coming out to dance on the street to music that an old car was playing from a huge sound system. One glassful had our cheeks rosey. Two glassfuls had our hearts thudding and by glass number three we both swore we could feel our hangovers already creeping in; so we donated the rest to some people next to us and staggered back to our hostel.

2. BRAZIL – HOT SAUCE SAVIOUR

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Nick Says: While the World Cup may be coming to an end, it’s been great to see images of Brazil on TV and all over the place for the last few weeks. Particularly Manaus, where we got to spend a week or so whilst waiting for our boat down the mighty Amazon. But we found Brazil a fair bit more expensive than Venezuela, thanks to the fact it isn’t in such dire economic and political turmoil as its neighbour… However, most things were a bit more than a dollar here, until we shopped for last minute supplies for the boat ride at a supermarket  (Carrefour!) and found some bargain hot sauce. While the 4 day boat trip through the Amazon was undoubtedly one of the highlights of the entire trip for us, it was the hot sauce that got us through it. A meal of bland beans, rice, and either chicken or beef twice a day quickly becomes tiresome, unless you just happen to have a bottle of fiery pepper sauce lying around. Then you suddenly become everybody’s best friend – which isn’t a bad thing on a boat where robbery isn’t entirely unknown… But 4 days of hot sauce changed me as a man. Before I was a bit bemused to watch Bee slather every meal with it. Now I’m right there with her, drowning any carefully prepared culinary delight in hot sauce (habanero preferably).

3. BOLIVIA – MICRO 4, THE ENDLESS BUS RIDE TO DINOSAURS

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Bee Says: Bolivia took us from Sugar, to Salt, to Stars and then up to the witch markets of La Paz and the epic Incan terrain of Isla del Sol. Our money certainly went furthest in Bolivia, and we reached the end of our month in the country under budget. It occasionally felt like it was actually hard to spend money, and this is probably demonstrated best by our adventure on the micro 4! Before we left for our travels we had been given a few “Top things to see before you die”, “50 Best bits of the world” type travel books and it was in one of these that we learnt we could walk with dinosaurs in Sucre, Bolivia at El Parque Cretácico (Dinosaur Park!!!) In most of Bolivia one mode of transport is a “micro” – a small mini bus that drives a circuit of the town but that can drop passengers at other spots on route for a few extra Boliviano. The micro’s are varying in quality, we saw one with a hole in the floor through which you could watch the road zoom underfoot (!) but they are generally a cheap, safe(ish) and easy way to navigate the city. We knew the number 4 micro would take us to the Dinos, so hopped on and asked the driver, who nodded. Twenty minutes later, we pulled in to a millitary zone and it was clear this was the end of the line. The driver waved us off up a dirt path with no dinosaurs in sight. Eventually we stumbled across a beautiful palace like building, and as we entered we were told we were at The Castillo de la Glorieta. NO DINOSAURS HERE! I think maybe the driver had different ideas about the Bolivian culture we should be soaking up so had basically forced us to his favourite tourist spot? Either way we had a look around, meeting a group of school kids in there who ALL wanted their photos taken with the weird muy blanco foreigners! But, we really wanted dinosaurs, so we walked back to where our driver had dumped us and were told that yes, the parque was on the micro 4 route, but the opposite end of the line! We boarded a new 4 and 45 minutes later we had basically seen the whole of Sucre for about 60p and were finally at our desired destination.

4. CHILE – HAIRY LITTLE LLAMA MAGNET

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Nick Says: Chile has stated aspirations to be a ‘first world country’ in the next few years. It already feels like it’s there to be honest. It is the strongest economy in South America, and easily felt the most prosperous of all the places we visited. But as a result, it was also the most expensive of all the Latin American nations we went to. Making it even more expensive was the fact we had pitched up in San Pedro de Atacama – the major tourist destination in all of Chile. So while we managed to live as cheaply as possible (street food served in cage, delicious red wine from origin) it was pretty tricky trying to find something that matched the dollar challenge. But then we saw it, eyeing us up inside a tourist tat/artisan craft shop. It wanted to be bought. And it got its wish, and now lives on our fridge – becoming the Chile instalment of our other challenge, buying a fridge magnet from every country we visited.

5. PERU – HUANCHACO PIER (DAY OFF FROM BEING SICK…)

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Bee Says: Whilst we had some of our trip high points at Machu Picchu and Ollantaytambo, Peru wasn’t great to us for many reasons particularly Puno and the fact it will always be remembered as Poo-ru rather than Peru. When we weren’t frantically tag-teaming a toilet, we struggled to find much to write home about that cost less than a dollar. Tourism has hit Peru in a big way (its basically the new Thailand) and as such, prices reflect this. We had a nice day out in the sunshine in Huanchaco though, and we handed over a dollar for both of us to stroll around the creaky wooden pier. From here we stood for hours watching local lads fishing with bits of wire glued to a square of wood; which seemed to be working well for them judging from the splish-splashing buckets full of fish we saw.

 6. ECUADOR – PINK CATERPILLAR RIDE OF JOY (THE WINNER!!!!)

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Nick Says: We’d just taken a last minute decision to fly out to the Galapagos Islands, paid out a not-insubstantial amount of money to a tour agency (which we had no idea would be legit or not – but turned out to be amazing) for a 7 night cruise around the islands, and were now sitting eating a slice of pizza and drinking a beer while trying to get our heads round the fact we no longer had the money. Was it a good idea or not? Had we made a mistake? One beer led to another, and then we heard a rumbling along the road. Not much traffic goes past on the Galapagos, so we were pretty curious. But this curiosity turned to first disbelief, then incredible excitement once we saw the source of the rumbling –  a giant motorised pink caterpillar on massive wheels came zooming past. We looked at each other and nodded. We quickly grabbed our stuff and shouted, ‘let’s chase it!’ Which wasn’t the best plan as it was really quick. Finally we caught up with it as the next bunch of excited people (mainly children if I’m being honest) got on-board. We leapt on, ready to hand over any amount of money to ride the pink caterpillar (a phrase I never thought I’d write) and laughed with joy as the man asked for a dollar each for the privilege. We knew we had a winner before the ride even started, but the journey confirmed it. Putting peddle to the metal, we roared off on a whistle stop tour of Puerto Ayora. No stopping for you pedestrian! Out of my way giant tortoise! We rode on for what seemed to be miles, careering around corners like a bat out of hell. But then came the surprise ending. Pulling up at what we thought to be the finish, the driver then proceeded to doughnut the pink caterpillar in high-speed circles. We whooped at him to keep going. He obliged. What a dollar. A few days later as our cruise stopped by Puerto Ayora we talked most of our fellow passengers to hop and ride with us again. They loved it.

7. COLOMBIA – SECRET JUNGLE PAN AU CHOCOLAT

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234adc4c6a9c11e3838a1219189c01ee_8Bee Says: From our Galapagos adventuring where we spotted giant tortoises, swam with sharks and scampered about with blue footed boobys  (and pink caterpillars..!) next we hiked into the wilds of Colombia, spending some time camping in Tayrona National Park before celebrating Christmas in  40 degree hot hot hot Cartagena. Not being a natural adventurer, the one thing that tempted me into this remote jungle was the TRAVEL LEGEND that somewhere… deep beneath the canopies… was apparently the best pan au chocolate in South America. It’s hinted at in Lonely Planet and people who have visited Tayrona whisper hished directions to the bakery as they pass in hostels and bars. We ended up hitting jackpot with our campsite, as it was a mere 2 minute stroll (follow the irrisitable smell that starts wafting to your tent at 4.30am!) to pick up these giant chocolate loafy beauties, which fill you up all day for hiking and swimming. You could easily walk past the small shack serving up these unexpected delights, so to find them we had to follow the eau de chocolat with our nose; cartoon style. Forget yoga, stuffing my face with these was my number 1 happy place!

8. PANAMA – SOAP AT LAST

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Bee Says: By the time we hit Peru, our supplies of British shower gel had well and truly run out. We weren’t worried; after all we had managed to stock up on sun cream, shampoo and pretty much every other essential we needed whilst on the road. However, shower gel and soap were another matter entirely. For three long countries trekking, we just could not find anything! The odd shower gel we stumbled over would be imported from USA and cost about $20 a pop, so we had to sadly return it to the shelf and carry on our stinky sticky way. Panama was almost a dollar challenge bust; firstly because after our real-life-horror-story crossing the Darian gap, and Nick’s nasty back injury, we spent the majority of our time in a hotel room where nothing cost less than a dollar! Then one night I snuck out to purchase a few make-your-own-mini-bar snacks from a shop over the road and on the shelves were… SOAP! A real life bar of soap! And better yet, it cost $1. This beaut gave us a great deal of joy and lasted us all the way to Mexico, even if by then it was a scraggly slither of joy rather than in its original glorious form.

 9. COSTA RICA – SWEATY BORDER CROSSING COCONUTS

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Bee Says: Costa Rica heralded sloths, snakes, night hikes, the best Mexican food we would ever eat and… the WORST border crossing of the entire trip. We went through the main Panama/Costa Rica border crossing, at Paso Canoas. First we were herded into a little room where our names were ticked off and sniffer dogs smelt our bags (and cheekily pulled out some of my underwear!) before being herded back out again and into a massively long queue for an exit stamp. After a breezy hour or so, we were finally let out of Panama and allowed to queue up for Costa Rica entry/searches/waiting around for no real reason. That wait went on… and on… and on… and in total the border crossing took over 4 excruciating hours of standing around. As Nick said in our original post about Costa Rica: For those of you thinking backpacking is all beers on the beach, try standing around a sweaty border crossing for a few hours while men with guns ask you questions! When we had finally been allowed to enter Costa Rica officially, we were both feeling weary, wiped and woeful. And just then, a man approached us selling coconuts… 2 for a dollar! Suddenly travel life was on the up again.

10. NICARAGUA – BASEBALL ON BIG CORN

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Nick Says: Ah Nicaragua. Probably our favourite country on the entire trip. Whether it’s a visit to the gorgeous colonial city of Granada, going to the world’s weirdest museum in Leon, riding on a boat with pigs and meeting the incredible Ike on Big Corn, and of course getting engaged on the tropical island paradise Little Corn, this was a country full of adventures and stories. It was also fertile ground for the dollar challenge. Beer was a buck, lobster not much more, bus rides and museums were a dollar, but the winner had to be the baseball game we went to on Big Corn. One tiny island, four competitive teams all battling it out for the championship. Saturday night was baseball night. The standard is high – one Big Corn local had made it to the Major League in recent years. The atmosphere was amazing, all beers and reggae music blasting out. We paid our dollar equivalent entry and walked in. We saw 5 balls before the tropical storm that had plagued us for days strike one last time, and rain off the whole thing. Days later, once we were back from Little Corn and catching up with Ike once again, he told us about the rearranged game the night before – and that he had tried to get hold of us over on Little Corn in order to ship us back, put us up for free at his, and take us to the game as he knew how much we wanted to see it! What a guy. But luck was on our side, as the last game of the championship had been brought forward. I could go. Sadly for Bee she was laid low with illness (/engagement boozing hangover), so I dashed across the airfield, got into the stadium, grabbed some fried chicken and watched a classic. My team (North End) may have been beaten in the last innings, but the game had it all. The crowd had even more. Sign me up to next year’s games.

11. EL SALVADOR – DESPERATE TIMES MCDONALDS

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Bee Says: There’s not much to say about El Salvador as sadly we were so squeezed for time that we only passed through San Salvador and the only money we spent was on… McDs! We tried to avoid the golden arches on the majority of our trip, but on this occasion we’d been in a bus since 3am for over 10 hours with no food, and being forced to watch a really weird almost-porno movie in a tiny sticky mini bus going over pot holes… we just could not bring ourselves to travel far to scavenge for food. McDonalds winked at us as we pulled into San Salvador and we were powerless to resist. Luckily it made for a handy (predictable) dollar challenge winner, as it turns out they have the pound-saver menu everywhere and our cheeseburgers were $1. Fun fact; in McDonalds in Latin America they put jalapenos in the burgers instead of pickles.

12. HONDURAS – MARKET PLACE EARRINGS

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Nick Says: My solo trip to Honduras was pretty eventful. When not scampering about Mayan ruins, or drinking delicious German beer in a micro-brewery, I was trying to dodge fiery protests  and bribery requests at the border. In between all that though, I was able to take time to do a little bit of shopping in Copan Ruinas. A beautiful, if somewhat heavily patrolled by soldiers, town the market offered loads of goods for great prices. I managed to pick up these earrings with a dollar after buying a few other pieces from the friendly market stall trader, and got to treat Bee with them on my return. I think she liked them!

13. GUATEMALA – ONLY A BLOOMIN’ ENGAGEMENT RING!

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Bee Says: After rocking my finest biro-bling for the journey to Guatemala, we thought it was time to upgrade to something a lil snazzier (but still unlikely to make me a target of crime). I found this beautiful hand-carved two tone wooden ring in a trinket treasure trove in Flores, and yep – it was $1 exactly. Obviously the real deal once we got back cost a wee bit more but if it hadn’t been for the fact that by the time we returned to England this wooden number was pretty much rotting off my finger and smelling pretty funky… I might not have been so hasty to upgrade to diamond and sapphires!

14. BELIZE – THE ORIGINAL CINNABON

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Nick Says: Caye Caulker was one of the most photogenic parts of the trip. A Caribbean getaway, we kicked back here for a week before heading onto Mexico and the end of our time in Latin America. The big thing in Belize was the food. We’d been a whole heap of different things ‘you just gotta try’, and they certainly lived up to the hype. Eating in restaurants may have been a bit pricey on the island, but street eats were plentiful and bargainous. We had cakes a-go-go from a big friendly chef guy, fried fish, breakfast burrittos to die for, and ice cold Belikin beer to wash it down. But the number one food we were told to try by everyone was cinnamon rolls from one specific bakery on the back-streets. Open only for a few hours twice a day, the cinnamon rolls would normally be sold out in about 30mins. So we turned up a dutiful 15 mins early, camped out by the door, and rushed through a soon as the sign was turned round to ‘open’. Did we want frosting on them? the baker asked. We sure did. I can still taste them now, simply some of the finest cinnamon rolls I’ve ever eaten, and two of the for a dollar!

15. MEXICO – CHEESY CHURROS IS WRONG

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Nick Says: I can’t say we really saw a whole lot of Mexico, but we did see a mariachi band playing in a food court and drink tequila with Mexican businessmen in a hotel lobby. We also went to the mall a lot, and were tempted daily by churros – delicious deep fried doughnut treats loaded with chocolate, caramel, or cheese. Wait, what? Yep, who doesn’t want hot liquid cheese on the sugary snack? It looked wrong, and potentially illegal. And at $2 sadly out of the budget for the dollar challenge, so the cheesy tempter remained uneaten, and we satisfied ourselves with 2 regular churros for the same price – making them a dollar each.

The dollar really is the currency of the world, and it was amazing to see what  we could, and couldn’t, get with a buck. It added a fun game to the times when we had to tighten our budget, and I can’t thank Kerry enough for setting us up with the greenbacks. So, if you guys have found anything amazing for a dollar on your trips, please let us know!

 

Rollin´, Rollin´, Rollin on the (Amazon) River

Nick Says: So last time you heard from us, we were just about to set off on our 4 day river-boat up the Amazon, and across to almost the Bolivian border. We were packed and raring to go, but I had forgotten one important thing – things never go to plan when you`re travelling. After heading down to the busy port in Manaus, we asked around for our boat. After several attempts by the sellers to send us to Belem (several hundred kilometres the other direction) we finally got our tickets, only to find out the boat was delayed by a day. Ok, no problem – we just settled in for another night and spent the day at a nature park. Rather fortuitously we met another backpacker there, who came up to us to ask us bus directions. He turned out to be a British guy named Mark (I always need one to travel with) who after turning 50 had decided to jack in his old life in London and go and travel the world. So far he had been in South America for 9 months, visiting almost every country bar Peru, Ecuador, and Colombia. Amazingly, he also turned out to be getting the exact same boat as us, which was really unusual as we were doing the non-backpacker route and fully expected to be the only westerners aboard. He was a very chilled out guy and easy to get along with, and being older it meant we all got treated with a bit more respect by the locals. Several times he was asked if he was our Dad! Although most of the time people thought he was Brazilian as he was super tanned. A proper ex-pat look going on!

So with our new travel buddy we arranged to meet the next morning at the dock. We waved goodbye to our hostel friends, and set off on one of the sweatiest walks of our lives. Manaus has been described as a pressure cooker, and with our bags on our backs we certainly felt the heat. By the time we finally reached the port we´d probably lost about 1 stone in weight. The only trouble was, we´d gone to the wrong port – our boat was sailing from one 10 mins walk away. So we set off again, sweating all the way there. We found our ticket seller, who put us on the phone to the captain of the boat, who spoke a very poshly accented English and apologised for the delay. He said the boat was just about to arrive and we could put our bags on and string our hammocks up ready for a 6pm departure. However, once down at the docks there was no sign of the Dois Irmaos (our boat to be) and instead a sailor miming that it was still on the river. We were hot, and had no idea what to do next. Setting our bags down, Bee decided to go back up to the agent and get hold of the captain. I would wait by the bags surrounded by sweaty sailors. Ages seemed to go past before Bee returned – and I must admit I was starting to get a bit worried! But she came back with news – the boat had broken down, missed its slot at the dock and wouldn´t be setting off until the next day at the earliest. Declining an invitation to spend the night on a different boat at the dock, we returned defeated to the hostel. Our reward for another night in Manaus? Going to the main plaza in the evening and getting to listen to what was claimed as a Beatles tribute band, but actually only played Paul McCartney compositions – including a mighty rendition of Live and Let Die.

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The next day broke with a promise of Amazonian adventure. We met back up with Mark, arranged a new meeting time, and told ourselves we would leave today. Another sweaty walk to the docks, but this time when we arrived about a hundred agents and dock workers rushed to greet Bee and shake her hand, and exclaim loudly at her in Portuguese. It turned out she had made a lot of friends in her stubborn quest to find out what had happened to the boat the day before. So if you ever need to sort out a boat from Manaus in the future, take Bee Barker with you. This time luck was with us, the boat was there! We boarded, put our hammocks up and waited to set sail. A mere two days behind schedule it did, and the three of us cracked open a beer on the top deck as we cruised down the Rio Amazonas and watched Manaus disappear into the distance.

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Bee Says: I had no idea what to expect from 4 days on a boat on the Amazon, but the most important thing was that I was armed with a leopard print hammock so was by far the snazziest on board! We were lucky enough to bag a spot on the second deck (of three) as the bottom deck had the scorchingly hot and noisy engine, and the top deck had a soundsystem playing Brazilian pop all hours of the day. As we left in the dark there wasn´t too much to see but we could just make out the moment we crossed the “meeting of the waters” where the white Rio Solimoes meets the Rio Negro, google images here! Lots of the artwork and tiling of the pavements in Manaus, and wider Brazil, is inspired by black and white waves because of this. We strung our hammocks up, with me in between Mark and Nick. The swaying of the boat kept knocking our hammocks into each other like those executive desk toys from the nineties. But soon the waves lulled us to sleep and we woke excited for our first day on deck. Every day basically followed the same routine: Wake up at sunrise (5am) to eat cream crackers & drink piping hot coffee for breakfast. Head to the top deck before the sun gets too hot, to wildlife spot. Ive never seen so many amazing creatures! We saw the famed pink river dolphins (as magical as they sound!) that played and splashed “escorting” our boat along the whole 4 days, giant otter (again, as if regular otters aren´t cute enough?), monkey fish that hurtle up to a metre in the air from the water to gobble insects, fireflies that glowed orange, yellow and green, toucans and parrots in every colour possible. Ocassionally I´d see a few red leaves on an otherwise green tree and think back to how autumn must be setting in back home… then the “leaves” would suddenly fly away, and I´d realise they were red ibis birds.

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Lunch was always chicken, rice, beans, salad and noodles. Post-lunch was siesta time for everyone, as the stifling tropical heat made it impossible to do anything else. By 3pm it was back up top for more gazing around, watching the little communities on the riverbanks as they use the Amazon for everything – food, washing, working and travelling. Dinner was… IDENTICAL to lunch but with beef! We had read a top tip before taking this trip which was to buy pimiento hot sauce, firstly to flavour the food and secondly to befriend your neighbours… and this definitely came in very handy. After dinner we were treated every night to the most dramatic, incredible thunder and lightning storms that lasted hours. Luckily… no rain accompanied them, so we could huddle on the deck and watch lightening forks set the sky ablaze and thunder rattle through our bones. Words can´t really do justice to those nights, they were a pinch-yourself  memory I’ll always treasure.

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Even the toilets and showers weren’t that bad. The best shower by far was the ladies on bottom deck, which had a hole for a window at the exact right eye level so I could watch the Amazon float past as I washed my hair! You had to share your shower with a few spiders too, but they kept to themseves mostly. The toilets were similar to what you would expect from a music fetival after a similar amount of days/quantity of people using it. All in all the Amazon was a perfect serene experience and one I would recommend to everyone! Compared to official organised tours over here which can cost a fortune, this is public transport so we paid a tiny amount for such an incredible experience. The only bad side, which  am loath to mention but I have to be honest, was there were a few young lads our age on board. One morning, a guy sidled up to me and asked me to take a shower (and you can imagine what else) with his friend. I was so gobsmacked that I could barely respond other than saying NO loudly and many times. It really rattled me, as up until this point I have barely had a sleazy second glance and mostly men have been overly chivalrous towards me everywhere we have been. Also it was so obvious Nick and I were together, so he had some nerve waiting until I was on my own to ask. The experience did upset me, as the boys would keep staring at me (although to be fair the views are boring to them, as they’ve lived there forever!) but I didn’t feel threatened – just irritated as you cant really escape anyone on a small boat! I was extra careful after this though for peace of mind, Nick accompanied me everytime I went to the showers and toilets, waiting outside like a bodyguard. I felt like Cheryl Cole! But being with Nick and Mark I never felt worried about it and it was easy to forget about them. I only mention it because up until this point there isn’t a single thing we’ve done that I think would be unsafe for a woman travelling alone – however with the Amazon I would recommend (if you dont speak Portuguese) going with at least another person, or a group. This also makes sense from a security perspective, as it means you can always have one person bag-watching.

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Nick Says: Apart from the sleazy boys, who left us well alone after a chat (which weirdly involved Disney and barbequeing a bear, so maybe not the intimidating talk I wanted), everyone else on the boat was great company. Little communities soon formed between everyone, and your neighbours soon became friends. Despite our obvious lack of Portuguese language skills, it didn’t stop anybody from chatting to us constantly. The were several memorable people on the boat. First was Boss-Lady, who made the meals, served them to us (we were always last!) and basically ran the domestic side of the ship. There was no way you’d mess with her, even if she alternated between wearing beautiful dresses and Justin Bieber vests. Every morning she would wake us up for breakfast, a gentle nudge for Bee, a stinging slap on my feet for me. Smiles for Bee, scowls for me. However, she took a real shine to Mark, giving him extra coffee when she wasn’t supposed too! The charming devil. Next came the Argentine bikers, two middle-aged guys who had rented the cabin at the front. They were divorced three times each, and were motorbiking around South America on giant BMW bikes similar to those used in Long Way Round/Down, and which were stored in the hold. They didn’t have any maps though, so often borrowed my guidebook to plan their route! We were able to talk to them a bit more in Spanish, although Argentine Spanish is quite different apparently. Then there was distinguished chap. He had a neat little beard and always looked immaculate, no matter the hour. He also seemed quite stern at first. However, 4 days on a river-boat worked their magic on him and by the last day he was bare-chested, swigging beer at 8am in the morning, and beardless. He was also constantly chatting to us, and offering us things, pointing out animals on the bank, and generally saluting everyone. Finally there was crazy old guy who of course was in the hammock next to me. He became obsessed with Bee’s mosquito net (put up as a territory defender, as there was a real lack of mozzies) and convinced it would fly away, so was constantly instructing me to wrap it up. Or just pointing at it. Or stroking it. He also liked to shout at me in Portuguese while standing very close to me and occasionally slap my bum.

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Bee Says: We made a stop en route to drop off some frozen fish from the cargo, which was THE entertainment of the trip. Our boat neighbours, who hadnt seemed fussed by majestic river dolphins, swarmed on deck watching for an hour as the various huge fish were unpacked, weighed and rejected or accepted. There were so many types, zebra stripes and one that looked like a mini Moby Dick.

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Next it was straight on to Porto Velho where we arrived at an eye watering 4am. We could sit about onboard until 6am, when we had ONE mission. Get to Bolivia… in a DAY! We did this by getting straight on a bus, a melty 5 hours to Guajara Mirim (the Brazilian border town) with no air con. There was time for a quick look around this quaint little place and to get our exit stamp for Brazil (after our Venezuela mishap we were determined to get it right this time). Then it was on to a passenger launch which crossed over the River Mamore as the sun set, and in five minutes we were in Guayaramerín… HOLA BOLIVIA!